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Wednesday, March 02, 2005

The ministry of pain

"Sending out a message of dignity, courage and acceptance of the trials of life. “ This is the message that the ailing 84-year-old Bishop of Rome is sending out to the world as he suffers through his agony for all the world to see.

On January 16, my wife gave me a print out of the icon “Veneration of the Precious Chains of the Holy and All-Glorious Apostle Peter” I taped to to the left side of my monitor in my home office.

I have learned a little about this icon, and I’ll share…

Event occurred around 42. 
Event ordered by Harod Agrippa

Event was:
Peter was thrown into prison for preaching about Christ the Savior.  In prision he was held by two chains made of iron.  During the night before the trial, an angel of the Lord removed these chains and led him out of the prison.

Event recorded:  Acts 12:1-11

Additional Information:  Christians who learned of the miracle took the chains and kept them as precious keepsakes. For three centuries the chains were kept in Jerusalem, and those afflicted with illness and approached them with faith received healing. Patriarch Juvenal (July 2) presented the chains to Eudokia, wife of the emperor Theodosius the Younger, and she in turn transferred them from Jerusalem to Constantinople in either the year 437 or 439.

Eudokia sent one chain to Rome to her daughter Eudoxia (the wife of Valentinian), who built a church on the Esquiline hill dedicated to the Apostle Peter and placed the chain in it. There were other chains in Rome, with which the Apostle Peter was shackled before his martyrdom under the emperor Nero. These were also placed in the church.

On January 16, the chains of St. Peter are brought out for public veneration.

Troparian - Tone 4

You came to us without leaving Rome
through the precious chains that you wore.
First-enthroned of the apostles,
we bow down to them in faith and pray:
“Through your prayers to God grant us great mercy.”

Kontakion - Tone 2

Christ the Rock radiantly glorifies the Rock of Faith,
the first-enthroned of the disciples;
He calls us to honor the miracles wrought through Peter’s chains,
so that He may grant us forgiveness of our sins.

I’m new to Orthodoxy.  I am new to “Classical Christianity”.  I’ve had trouble with these chains and with this idea of suffering. 

I look at the Pope in Rome and see his suffering and the “Ministry of Suffering” that he bears.  I look at the wonderful Alana Sheldahl, and I see the suffering that she bears.  I look at my lovely wife with her Muscular Dystrophy (Dermatomyositis), I look at me with my constant pains.  I look at the deaths and humiliation that surrounded the dying process with my Mother and Grandmother.  I look at the pain of the deaths of my Uncle and Grandfather.

I hate sin, death, and the devil!

I used to not care about any of the three.  I think this is where the devil would have us.  But, with life comes suffering.  With life comes death, and with life comes sin. 

Ours is a Ministry of Suffering. 

It is hard to ask a sufferer how they are doing.  What are they going to say?  As Alana put it on her blog:

So what do I say when people ask me: “How are you doing?” Do I say, well, my hips, and a spot on the back of my head, and my forearms are hurting right now, and my left bicep is burning unnaturally as if I were lifting weights, and my tongue and lips are slightly numb this morning, not to mention the ache in my left quad and my UTTER lack of energy?

Do I say all that? Or do I just smile and say: “Fine, thanks”? Or should I shrug my shoulders and give a rueful glance and not say anything?

The other day I asked Dana, “How are you doing today compared to yesterday?” I think I like this question better, as I know how she was yesterday.  But I have intimate knowledge of how she was yesterday.  Most people cannot ask it that way.

Sunday, February 27, 2005

The picture to the right

The picture to the right is of Mount Rainier as viewed from just north of Lake Union. 

I’ve said many times that when I lived there I felt like I lived on a post card.  There was year around snow capped mountains to the east, the Puget Sound and the Ocean to the West. 

I lived there three years and I loved it.  My brother and his family still live there.  I miss them. 

Anyway, this was one of the views that I had while I was there. 

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Bah, Humbug!

I actually posted this as a comment on <a href="http://drbacchus.com/wordpress/index.php?p=839">Dr Bacchus' board</a>. However, I find it personally important enough to also post here.

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I don?t know how long you had been thinking about doing this event (years it seems). However, I recall sometime around last January you really getting serious about it - at least in our discussions. You also mentioned that you had been working on the glossary.

At that time I indicated that I would want to attend, and I spent the better part of a year waiting in patient anticipation.

I was SO looking forward to the event. Although Dana?s treatments was not going to allow her to come, I was going to come anyway.

Then IT happened. IT began about 3:00 p.m. that day and ran until about 3:30 a.m. and me finally getting to bed around 4:00 a.m.

I'm not sure if I am more pissed off or disappointed that I did not get to attend this event. I think both.

1) It was my friend sharing something he is passionate about with his friends
2) It is an opportunity to hear a classic tale
3) Smoking Bishop, enough said there
4) All the work you have put in over the years with this project
5) My love for literature and a good tale

So, instead of enjoying and appreciating the above things, I was stuck at work fixing things.

I would like to say "but i'm not bitter", but I AM!! Terribly so!!

I'm also in one of those jobs where when I do work like that I don?t get a ?thank you, kiss my ass, or nothing?? I didn?t get paid extra for doing it, I got no reward of any kind (other than the problem being fixed). And I missed something I really wanted to attend!!

I am very sorry Rich that I could not attend, please accept my apologies.

I hope that you will do it again, I hope that you will accept my apologies, and I hope that you will invite me to the next one.

--Moose

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Monday, August 30, 2004

This past week - fun and excitement for our lives!

Several people have asked, and I really do not have time to go into details with everyone, so, I am putting the highlights here. Notice that this is not chronilogica... as number 4 actually happened the day before number 1. 1) Thursday and Friday my significant other was at a clinic receiving IVIG for dermatomyositis (<a href="http://www.emedicine.com/med/topic2608.htm">look here</a> for excellent article by the specialist we go to.) 2) Saturday, we spent most of the day in the ER dealing with severe headaches and other reprecussions associated with the IVIG treatment. 3) We spent the rest of the weekend at home also dealing with reprecussions. Gotta love suppositories! 4) Wednesday significant others' bathtub drain was clogged. Called the maintenance people. Maintenance person shows up with a wrench in hand. Sent time in bathroom, declared victory and left. 5) Thursday, water heater spewing its contents through the top valve into the open drain hole. Apparently #4 was not successful as the drain hole was backed up and was noticed when about 3 inches of water was seen in the laundry room - which, by the way, the carpeting and cushioning were happy to soak up for us. 6) Called maintenance people (8:30 a.m.). Call went to answering service as the office does not open until 9:00. Told them what the problem was and that we needed maintenance people immediately. 7) At 9:10 called the office. The manager said he was just reading a note from answering service that said to call us. Nice of them to respond so quickly. Manager said he would walki-talki the maintenance people. 8) Maintenance people show up about 9:30. Oh, btw, when water turned off in significant others' bath, the flow in the laundry room stopped - so no additional water entering house. 9) Maintenance people "turn down" the water heater and say I can take a shower. So I did. I then took significant other to medical stuff. 10) At medical place until 9:30 p.m. Significant other has a head ache. 11) Come home - water in kitchen running. Significant other's bathtub is filthy. Many things moved around. Significant other takes advil and goes to bed. 12) Friday morning I took the last loritab that I had in my little bottle. (Big bottle contains about 50 more.) 13) Took shower... significant other did too. Laundry room floods. 14) Called maintenance. Left message with answering service and also with office as it was before they opened. 15) Went to medical place. 16) Talked to office manager via cell phone. - they said they would get it fixed. 17) Came home around 5:30 p.m. to see a big blower in the hall closet blowing air under the carpet. Carpet still damp, and puffy from the air. 18) Significant other's headache much worse, also is spitting up stomache juices. 19) Advil does not help. Significant other up all night - can't sleep due to pain and bloated/full feeling in stomach. 20) Saturday Morning go to take significant other to doctor. Need more meds. Go to bathroom - big bottle of loritab missing. Asked significant other if moved. No, but her meds were moved around. 21) Call office, tell them that meds are missing and, oh, by the way, the top of the water heater is still leaking. 22) Take significant other to doctor's office, but will be 11:00 before can get in to see on-call doctor. 23) Go to Urgent Treatment Center. $15 copay - better than expected. 24) Gave rundown to doctor there. Doctor had heard of most of the words we mentioned, but no clue their true significance and meaning in this situation. Does basic exam and sends us to ER where they are better equipped for things like this, and taking blood and stuff. 25) This migrane type headache is, of course, more painful the brighter it is... so the beautiful sunny morning was not as pleasant for us as it was for many people that day. 26) To the ER. On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being debilitating, headache deemed to be a 9. Still spitting up juices. 27) Nurse attempts to give an IV... blood everywhere, lots of pain, not a good stick so needle removed. Additional attempts are refused on patient's part. 28) First philbotomist looks for vein to draw blood. no luck. We think they all went and hid after the IV debachle. 29) Second philbotomist called in. 30) Shot given in the rump for pain and stomach. 31) Second philbotomist gets good stick and gets blood. 32) Went outside and checked messages. Dr. Callen had called and left cell phone number. Returned his call. Said to make sure they checked Kidney function, give something for the pain. Apparently, that is why they drew blood and gave shot. 33) Pain from 9 down to 7. 34) Another shot. 35) Stomach problem goes from spitting up to full fledged vomit. 36) Perscripts given pain medication (Loritab), and two kinds of stomach stuff. One for each end. 37) About 2:00 sent home from ER. Cat scan looked normal; kidney function, electrolytes, etc. all look normal. 38) Significant other goes to bed upon arrival to home. 39) About 4:00 maintenance people show up wanting to look at hot water heater. They looked at it. Started to leave to go get equipment. I asked them if they were planning to make noise. They said yes, so I said no. Not while my significant other was asleep. They asked when I would prefer for them to come back. I stated that I would prefer that the fixed it on Thursday, then my second preference would be that they fixed on Friday instead of being theives and stealing medication, my third preference was that they fixed it this morning while we were at the hospital. We decided that since it wasn't leaking that much that they return the first part of the week and fix it then. 40) Friday was the last day for one of my netops people, so I gotta backfill that position as well. Well, those are the highlights anyway. Bless... David Pe+er

Tuesday, February 17, 2004

I gotta learn to be careful what I say…

People have been saying that for years. "You need to be more careful what you say.... " I put the "..." there because usually there is a "when" or a "concerning" followed by a situation or topic, however, not always. Anyway, I used to have this goal. It was, I thought, pretty simple. "I want to be 'they'." Which of course meant following up that goal with what it actually meant. It meant, I wanted to be the "they" from the phrase, "They say, blah blah blah". Historically, I've always said pretty much whatever i wanted. I did this for a number of reasons. First, I would guess, is probably because I have an ego that is rather large. Second, I was taught from a very early age, by a widowed mother of three boys, to stand up for yourself, say what you think, and don't let anyone stop you. As a 21 year old widowed mother of three in the late 1960's this was probably an attitutude that kept her alive or at least sane. However, the problem is that outside of her own family, no one really was influenced by what she said. Any negative context here is certainly not intended. I am mearly trying to explain that she was probably rarely considered "they". I, on the other hand, being the author of 9 books, being in a position of management with my company, etc. it seems that at least at times, I am being "listend to". As this is happening, I am finding that I am praying that phrase more and more... "God, anything I have said, if it is of you, may it be like a seed planted. Anything not of you, may it whither away, never to be remembered." With authority comes humility, or maybe you just become a politician... who knows... Anyway, I guess I need to watch what I say a little more... maybe... We will see if I do or not, at least I am becoming aware that I might need to.. and, as they say, knowing is half the battle. Its late, i'm rambling... maybe this will make more sense in the morning... --Moose